Loss of the Spiritual High
Loss of the Spiritual HighIt's a beautiful thing when one comes to notice when they cannot feel the spiritual due to them driving it out by acting in a way that is not in line with the spiritual. The reason I say there is beauty in this is because that would mean that such an individual would've had to once feel the spiritual in order for them to have lost the spiritual. So many will never experience the spiritual because they are either unwilling to seek it, or they no not how. I had a particular experience, way back when, where I had been doing really well with my addiction for quite some time, even living a balanced life with spirituality as being the foundation. I was even feeling as if I had my addiction beat. I was eating healthy, working out regularly, reading, and working on my spirituality the most. A Saturday night rolled around and I got a small itch to take myself out of reality, which, I believe was due to me drinking too much caffeine through an energy drink that I had never tried before. As the day tarried on then so did my itch, and by the end of the day on Saturday I was ready to escape somehow someway.I battled all day in my head, even asking my sister in law if she had any Lor-tabs to spare since she had just gotten in a car wreck. She said no, and I was then embarrassed for asking. Then my mind traveled to alcohol, cigarettes, and of course weed. I came to the realization that pills weren't an option and I now justified my reasoning for wanting these other things because of how they seemed to be a better, less harmful option than Opiates. I then ended up caving and giving way to my desires, where I took my self out of reality through alcohol. It wasn't the headache this next day that bothered me, but it was the loss of the spiritual that bothered me the most. I felt like I was alone, and did not have the help that I was experiencing just the day before when I was doing so well. I worked hard this next day, praying to God, reading, writing, and praying some more. And though the whisper to continue on in taking myself out of reality was stronger than ever before, I didn't do it because I wanted to get that spiritual high back in my system as fast as possible; and I knew that if I took myself out of reality on this next day then I was only prolonging the time it would take to get the spiritual back into my system. I have finally come to realize that the spiritual high is the greatest of all highs. It's full of charity and love and is a high that people like when you are on it. No one likes you to be on the Opiate high because its a high that can be easily seen through - and comes off as being fake and temporary. The spiritual high portrays no such character, but only radiates truth and charity. I think the spiritual changes behavior more than anything else because its benefits leave you when you choose wrong over right. So now when you choose wrong you feel soulless and empty, which then feeds you the necessary motivation to feel your soul back up with the lasting high that can only come through the spiritual. When someone has been brought to the knowledge of the spiritual and has experienced it on a high level; and then they choose to go against that spiritual lifestyle that they have found so much light on, they then oftentimes feel guilty and broken hearted for the poor decision they have since made. At this point they could go one of two ways: they could become hardened to the spiritual and turn against it because they are tired of feeling bad about their poor decisions. Or they could actively work at getting the spiritual back in their system, with having a broken heart and a contrite spirit. The hardened option is the easy option since it takes no work to go in this direction, and is a fast immediate solution to not feeling bad or guilty. However, the spiritual option will take work, but it's benefits will be lasting and progressive. The point I'm trying to make is that once an individual has been brought to a spiritual knowledge then there is not only power in that knowledge, but also a great responsibility. So now when you go against what you know to be true then you are going to feel bad about your poor choice, which is fine and even necessary for growth to occur. I'm not speaking of dwelling and feeling sorry for yourself; but I'm speaking of having a broken heart and a contrite spirt, and then going to work on yourself so that you can get back on the spiritual path. We cannot be perfect in this life, and the spiritual lifestyle does in fact ask a lot out of us. Sometimes we can live up to what it asks from us, but other times we cannot. The only thing we can do is keep trying to progress in the spiritual by: studying, reading, praying, exercising, eating healthy, and of course, strive to be obedient to the laws of charity. We are not of the charitable character if we are mad always, with carrying contention around in our minds. We are not of the charitable character if we are envious of others, with having a hope for them to fail. We are not of the charitable character if we are wrapped up in the substances of this world since their way of life promotes nothing more than selfishness. The spiritual way is the charitable way; and when we drive charity out of our hearts we then lose love, which love and having an appreciation for all that's good are the key ingredients to getting high through spirituality. Without charity, we cannot experience love; and without love we are without hope, and can only rely on what the world has to offer, which are the quick immediate pleasures that cannot last. I'm so thankful that I have come to find this spiritual truth because now I am able to use the spiritual as a living breathing thing in my life.